Important Changes to Summer Eights

Date of Email1st Apr 2012Sent By:OURCs Secretary <secretary@ourcs[dot]org.uk>
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Dear all,

Because of the increased awareness of the sport of rowing due to the London
2012 Olympics, OURCs have decided that it is in the best interests of the
sport to make a few changes to the event in order to attract more
spectators. These suggestions have come from people who have emailed the
secretary, and vetted by members of the committee:

*GREENBANKS*

A large majority of people have commented that the Greenbanks stretch is
relatively boring as the river is very straight. To make it more exciting,
we shall place two buoys along the course. Crews that are still racing must
cross the river 3 times to slalom across the course. Crews that fail to
make the turn will be bumped down one place per buoy they miss. Crews that
try to make the turn but crash in to the bank will not be bumped, but
instead given a bigger rudder for the next day.

*COMMENTARY*

Many of you remarked about the standard of commentary during bumps races,
and how it should be more like the Boat Race. We've been hard at work for
the last few weeks to secure a solid presenting team for you next term.
Pre-race commentary will be supplied by the BBC's Clare Balding, including
input from Oxford graduates such as Oz Clarke, Ian Hislop and Edwina
Currie. During the races, famed athletics commentator Ortis Deley and the
former Madness frontman Suggs will provide commentary over the tannoy.

We will also be employing the use of the OURCs helicopter for an aerial
view of procedings, if costs allow.

*DOWNSTREAM VERSUS UPSTREAM*

Many of you know that the flow of the river has been quite slow this year,
thanks to good old global warming. Yesterday, for the first time in the
Isis' history, the flow of the river has reversed. This means that
Haystacks is now UPSTREAM and the Head of the river is DOWNSTREAM. Please
get used to the new protocol! The most immediate upshot of this is that the
racing line is now the middle of the river - to the delight of many
lower-boat coxes everywhere. X/S coxes should locate their nearest novice
cox to learn how to take this new line.

*BUNGLINES*

Many coxes have been in touch to say that they find one aspect of the start
sequence risky and terrifying - letting go of the bungline once the start
gun has been fired. While some of you may think this is a trivial matter,
only a handful of people will remember the Great Debacle of 1974. During
that year's Summer Eights, no fewer than 7 coxes were so paralysed with
fear that they were catapulted out of the boat and the race immediately
klaxoned.

To make sure that this never happens again, we have acquired pyrotechnic
devices that are electronically wired to the cannon and sever the rope on
the start gun - or in short, exploding bunglines.

=====

The necessary rule changes to allow these new features will be implemented
during the first captains' meeting next term. Any questions, comments or
suggestions should be sent to the OURCs committee.

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Dear all,

Because of the increased awaren= ess of the sport of rowing due to the London 2012 Olympics, OURCs have deci= ded that it is in the best interests of the sport to make a few changes to = the event in order to attract more spectators. These suggestions have come = from people who have emailed the secretary, and vetted by members of the co= mmittee:

GREENBANKS

A large majority of people have commented that= the Greenbanks stretch is relatively boring as the river is very straight.= To make it more exciting, we shall place two buoys along the course. Crews= that are still racing must cross the river 3 times to slalom across the co= urse. Crews that fail to make the turn will be bumped down one place per bu= oy they miss. Crews that try to make the turn but crash in to the bank will= not be bumped, but instead given a bigger rudder for the next day.

COMMENTARY

Many of you remarked about the standard of com= mentary during bumps races, and how it should be more like the Boat Race. W= e've been hard at work for the last few weeks to secure a solid present= ing team for you next term.
Pre-race commentary will be supplied by the BBC's Clare Balding, includ= ing input from Oxford graduates such as Oz Clarke, Ian Hislop and Edwina Cu= rrie. During the races, famed athletics commentator Ortis Deley and the for= mer Madness frontman Suggs will provide commentary over the tannoy.

We will also be employing the use of the OURCs helicopter for an aerial= view of procedings, if costs allow.

DOWNSTREAM VERSUS UPSTREAM

Many of you know that the flow of the river has been quite slow t= his year, thanks to good old global warming. Yesterday, for the first time = in the Isis' history, the flow of the river has reversed. This means th= at Haystacks is now UPSTREAM and the Head of the river is DOWNSTREAM. Pleas= e get used to the new protocol! The most immediate upshot of this is that t= he racing line is now the middle of the river - to the delight of many lowe= r-boat coxes everywhere. X/S coxes should locate their nearest novice cox t= o learn how to take this new line.

BUNGLINES

Many coxes have been in touch to say that they = find one aspect of the start sequence risky and terrifying - letting go of = the bungline once the start gun has been fired. While some of you may think= this is a trivial matter, only a handful of people will remember the Great= Debacle of 1974. During that year's Summer Eights, no fewer than 7 cox= es were so paralysed with fear that they were catapulted out of the boat an= d the race immediately klaxoned.

To make sure that this never happens again, we have acquired pyrotechni= c devices that are electronically wired to the cannon and sever the rope on= the start gun - or in short, exploding bunglines.

=====
The necessary rule changes to allow these new features will be implemented = during the first captains' meeting next term. Any questions, comments o= r suggestions should be sent to the OURCs committee.

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